Life, Death, and Birthdays

We went to visit my brother Ezra, his wife Ginger, and my niece Chloe on Sunday to celebrate Chloe's birthday (which was a week ago.) Chloe just turned four (and is "Almost five!" as she told one of the kids) and a good time was had by all, playing in the backyard, eating lunch out, and opening birthday presents. The kids played on the swingset, Ez showed me his guitars and played some music, Ginger and I talked about kids and traded stories, and the dog ate some grass and threw up. As I said, a good time all the way around.

One of the things I bragged about was how well Gwen is coming along with her reading. Unfortunately, this came back to bite me when she came across the stone Ezra and Ginger had posted over the grave of their beloved cat (referred to as "Mommy Kitty" by little Chloe). "Is this a gravestone?" she asked, then read (if my memory is true), "Goodbye Mommy Kitty -- A Good Friend." Well, that got her waterworks going, and she cried for awhile until Uncle Ez introduced her to their new cat Cosmo.

I hoped that was the end of it, but as Adam and Xav did what men do best on long car trips -- slept -- on the way back, Gwen asked me some questions about "Mommy Kitty" and "Cosmo" and the mortality of our cats. She cried some more, but I managed to distract her by talking to her about her upcoming birthday party (I am getting a lot of mileage out of this party. I only hope she isn't sick of it before it happens.) Eventually we got home, and she and Xav ran around the yard with "bubble blowers" Aunt Ginger gave them and seemed to be reasonably happy. By the time bedtime rolled around, though, I got apprehensive.

Shortly after Gwen went to bed, she got up and called downstairs, asking me to check on a Praying Mantis egg case she has in the garage (because I don't want five hundred little praying mantises sitting around the house, watching TV, playing video games, and drinking beer). I checked (no babies yet!) and went upstairs to report. She was crying, of course (no surprise.) So we talked about life (Praying Mantis eggs), death (cats, Ruby the Tiger from the local zoo, and Aunt Tania's mother), and birthdays, and she seemed to settle down again. I guess death is a pretty heavy topic, and one day kids just "get" it, and it can be overwhelming. In the meantime, what my big fear is what I will use to distract her off these whims once her birthday is behind us.


On the life front ... my husband (yes, it pains me to tell you this) is a huge Abba fan (okay, Abba isn't that bad.) There is a song on one of his compilation CDs that is called "I'm a Marionette" that is from an Abba mini-operetta (or movie or something) called "The Girl with the Golden Hair." The gist of the song is that the singer is effectively a puppet -- she's steered through life by those who would have her do as they want (beginning to sound kinda apt in light of the whole Anna Nicole thing).

Anyway, Xavier also "translates" the meaning as "she is a puppet" and calls it "the puppet song." In his case, however, he envisions the singer as being some kind of REAL puppet that can talk and sing. He has expanded the "plot" of the song to the point that it is now about a puppet that is alive and is talking to a little boy. It is very funny to listen to him talk about this and expand the plot, but sometimes he asks you questions in the context of his made-up premise, and he can't understand why your answer bears little resemblance to his version. For example:

"Why does the puppet tell the little boy that it is not married yet?" (Marionette = Married-not-yet.)

"Why does the boy find a talking puppet in his room?"

"Why is the puppet telling the boy he is a puppet?"

"Why is the puppet telling the boy he is alive?"

("Xavier, the song is about a 'real' person.") "A real person who is a puppet?"

"Can we watch this movie sometime? I want to see the movie about the puppet."

To paraphrase another Abba song, he can "go on and on and on" about this topic. I wonder if I can check out Pinocchio and convince him that this is the theme song?

(I wonder if it is too soon to start talking to him about his birthday?)